Faster Than Before

I am a fully qualified Hypnotherapist, NLP Practitioner, EFT Practitioner, Reiki Master, Time Line Therapist, Anger Management and Weight Management Consultant and Meditation Teacher amongst other things…..phew!

I use most of what I have learnt during my sessions with clients and there are one or two things that I find work well and which I enjoy using  myself too. Visualization is incredibly powerful and can lift your mood as well as transform your future. But what about letting go of the proverbial crap from your past?

I stumbled on Faster EFT recently – the ‘baby’ of Robert Smith (no not that Robert Smith…). I love EFT as I find it calming, soothing and incredibly quick at letting go of hurts and trauma from the past, however this Faster EFT not only works just as effectively as EFT, it is also quicker and easier to use. And what I like the most is, its a tool which my clients can utilise away from therapy too. Win;Win all round!

The process is simple to follow and works quickly on releasing ‘trapped’ emotions from the past and if you don’t think you carry around trapped emotions, think of a memory which was particularly upsetting to you at the time or frightening and notice how you can still feel those old feelings.

Basically you focus on a ‘bad’ memory, and the feelings it brings up in you whilst tapping certain acupressure points on your face and collar bone and that’s it! Simple. Effective and quick. I like it and it works well with my clients too!

I use Faster EFT myself, especially after a bad day or if I have any unexplained aches and pains – its awesome! So if you are struggling to let go of the past or any limiting beliefs, give this amazing tool a go. Visit my website to access a free copy of how to do Faster EFT or have a look on YouTube – there are plenty of videos on there which you can tap along to!

Have a peek at the free Faster EFT script courtesy of Robert Smith – and have a go. You have everything to gain and nothing what so ever to lose!

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Will You Find The Weight You Lose?

I remember my dad always telling us when we were kids how English is a precise language. He was referring to what I suppose you could call Freudian Slips – when someone says something that they didn’t mean to say on a conscious level but it is believed to be what they wanted to say on a subconscious level. When someone dies – instantaneously our minds adapt to the past tense when speaking about them and it always amazes me how quickly our mind and language adapt. This has been the downfall of many a murderer on those murder mystery programs – when they unconsciously refer to the missing person in the past tense.

So when we talk about losing weight – what are we actually saying? That we want to lose weight? I am sure you would love to lose weight but do you really want to find it again? No I bet you don’t! So if you are one of the millions of people in the UK who is trying to ‘lose’ weight – surely you are using the wrong terminology? Because your mind is a pretty amazing tool and if it is told to ‘lose’ weight it will do what it is told to do – however it isn’t stupid – it also knows that when you lose things, car keys, money, those new earrings, you want to find them. So no surprise that  when you lose weight you eventually find it again!

So if English is a precise language and your mind understands the English Language  that you use (and the part of the mind that is responsible for your behaviours and habits- the subconscious mind – is literal too – so it will do what you tell it to) – even in your thoughts – then perhaps it’s about time you changed how you talked about your weight loss. The word loss itself has some pretty sad connotations attached to it too as it depicts actual ‘loss’ – loss of a loved one, loss of confidence, loss of love etc.

So if you want to shed that excess weight then use a word that gets your subconscious mind on board with your goal, after all this is the most powerful part of your mind. When we ‘shed’ things – like dead skin (yes it’s not a pleasant example but it works!)  we let go of it once and for all. It is ‘old’ and needs to be released – we don’t expect to get back something we have shed.

When we get rid of something this also suggests we are letting go of something that we no longer want, perhaps something that once served a purpose but no longer does now. ‘I got rid of all my old clothes the other day’, ‘I got rid of him, he was no good for me’.

When you want to lose weight – drop the ‘loss’ or ‘lose’ – and use a far more powerful and meaningful term instead such as ‘getting rid of excess weight’ or ‘shedding weight’.  Get your subconscious mind on board to help you reach your ideal weight – and make sure you set a weekly target for weight loss too – and make it reasonable and do-able. One or two pounds a week is okay (lift up a bag of sugar if you doubt this) and make sure to reward yourself when your reach your goals with something other than food.

So if you want to get rid of your excess weight – then I wish you the best. If you are struggling with your new healthy eating regime then think about purchasing my new Be Slim Hypnosis CD (and yes it does have the word loss on it – however that is a purely marketing choice!!)

Remember your excess weight is something that you want to say goodbye to once and for all so use a term to express this mentality – shed weight or let it go or get rid of it but definitely not lose it!!

 

So What Do You See?

It never ceases to amaze me how many people can tell you exactly what they do not want in life yet when you ask them what they want instead, they become quiet and in some cases, somewhat put out that you asked!

What you want in life is important isn’t it? If you want to be happy then it’s important to know what makes you happy so that you can be happy isn’t it? It’s important to focus on reaching your ideal weight if you are overweight yet very few people do.

How many people have you heard bemoan their excess weight or not being able to find nice clothes in their size or indeed clothes to fit them or how they just ‘lurve’ food (which technically they don’t as they barely if at all taste it because they eat too fast)?

When was the last time you heard someone say ‘I chose to be slim and healthy’ or ‘I will reach my goal weight easily and effortlessly’? Very rarely I can imagine.

What you focus on in life you get in life. If you focus on being fat then guess what? You will be fat! However if you stop moaning and start focusing on what you want – to reach your ideal weight and shape and look slim and sensational – then guess what? You are more than likely going to reach your ideal weight! And besides doesn’t it feel so much better to focus on how wonderful you are going to feel and look instead of focusing on something that makes you miserable?

Common sense prevails here. Focus on what you want and you are more likely to get what you want. Also focusing on what you want is a strong motivator especially if you imagine you ourself having the thing that you want! It makes you feel so much more positive and the more positive you feel the more likely you are to attract positive things (those things that you want) into your life

By focusing on what you want you are also employing the powerful Law of Attraction and like any natural law, such as the Law of Gravity, The Law of Attraction is in operation 24/7. So use it and get what you want in life and all you have to do if stay focused on what you want!

So next time you find yourself focusing on what you don’t want instantly change your point of focus to what you do want and be specific and state it in the positive. Do not say ‘I want to lose weight’ as you are STILL focusing on the weight! Simply state something like ‘I will reach my ideal weight of XX by XXDate and I will be slim and healthy’ or ‘I easily maintain my ideal weight’.

So focus on what you want in life and focus on the positive things too and pretty soon you will notice a shift. So remember……..

Focus. Focus. Focus. Persevere. Persevere. Persevere.

Stop! Pattern – Pattern Interupt

Break any habit or negative thought pattern easily with this simple NLP technique! Re-write your thoughts and habits and change how you think, feel and act yourself. Perseverance is key here however the more you do this the more positive your life will become! Good luck.

Milking it….. and losing weight.

Now there is one thing that most of us Brits take in some form or other and that’s milk. Be it in butter, cheese, yoghurt or just plain old milk in your tea, but have you ever stopped and thought about why you use milk?

Yes it cools down our tea or wets our cereal in the morning however did you really consider why you use milk?

If you think about it logically, cows’ milk is for calves. It’s provides them with nutrients to feed the young cow and ensure they grow strong and healthy. And there is the issues right there in the last sentence. The word GROW.

Milk is good for you we are told, mainly by the producers (and what used to be the Milk Board) as it’s full of calcium to help keep our teeth and bones nice and strong. But what about the growth hormone in milk? How does that affect us? And is it really natural for adults to be drinking milk, let alone cows’ milk?

Cows milk is naturally full of growth hormone (not to mention the growth hormones which are given to cows to increase their milk production too!) to make sure the little calf grows up into a nice big cow but surely that’s not your intention is it? Not only is milk full of fat but full of growth hormone too and as for cheese…….well that’s loaded with fat! So dairy products provides a ‘double whammy’ for those of you who are desperately trying to lose weight, it provides lots of ‘bad’ fat and then compounds this affect with growth hormones which cause your cells to get bigger and divide.

Unfortunately there is a darker side too to dairy products and the growth hormone. Growth hormones promote cell division in order for the calves to grow which is how it’s supposed to be, it’s natural, however it’s not natural at all for us!

Research conducted by the Institute of Molecular Bioscience indicates that the growth hormone (GH)in cows encourages the growth of breast and prostate cancer. Another study in the “Harvard News Gazette” reported a strong correlation with milk consumption and incidences of testicular cancer in men. GH causes cells to grow; if it causes cells to grow at an accelerated, unregulated pace, it potentially can result in cancer.

So think again before you reach for a glass of milk or that low fat yoghurt. If you are serious about weight loss one of the best ways to shed your excess weight is cut out dairy from your diet along with red meat. You will need to ensure that you find another sources of calcium, although regular pasteurised milk has very little calcium in it, such as spinach and other green leafy veg, almonds (which are packed with calcium), sesame seeds, fish and supplements.

Give up dairy for one month and I assure you that you will lose weight!

I Need A Little Time….

So you want to change? And you want to be slimmer? You want to be more confident, successful? Brilliant!

But you don’t have the time? You don’t know when you can squeeze that exercise in or find the time to actually sit down and eat properly? You’re too busy to think about that right now.

So pardon me for asking, but do you still want to lose weight? Do you still want to be more confident, successful?

Thankfully most of the people who come to see me with help to shed weight or feel better do have the time to make a difference in their lives! If you want to lose weight, be happier then you need to commit yourself to making time for yourself – it’s as simple as that!

Yes life is a lot faster today than it was years ago but if you seriously cannot find the time to make a difference in your life, then ask yourself why? I’m a single mum and life can be very hectic however I can play the victim card and bemoan how ‘I never get any time for myself with the kids’ or I can make time for myself because I know I deserve it. It’s a choice and a choice that sometimes can take a while to comprehend, but never the less, it is your choice.

Time is precious and they say never swap time for cash and it’s true. We can never buy back lost time, no matter how much we pay for it! Life is precious and life is time. It’s about living in the here and now. Not in the past or in the future but right here right now. The only time you can make a difference is now, not yesterday and not tomorrow but now.

Taking time for yourself is one of the easiest ways to feel better, however taking time for yourself does not mean sitting on your bum in front of the TV swigging down a bottle of wine! Taking time for yourself means taking time to appreciate yourself, to do something for yourself, something that you enjoy or perhaps something that can help you unwind such as a relaxing bath or long walk. By spending quality time with yourself you are nurturing yourself and telling yourself that you are worth it. Now that’s got to feel better than ‘sorry too busy’ hasn’t it?

Spend time with the ones you love too, as this can improve your sense of well being. Kids grow quickly don’t they? So take time to enjoy them now, because when they reach their teenage years they spend less and less time with you. I get up early some mornings so that me and the kids can walk a longer way to school because it means I get to spend some quality time with them and I find this one of the best ways to start my days – it certainly beats shouting and rushing to get out of the house on time for school.

How you spend your time is YOUR choice. Yes we need to work and yes we need to feed the kids but come one – you could make time if you really wanted to! Being a martyr isn’t really going to help you feel any better is it and it certainly won’t help your mental and physical welfare either.

Most successful people today attribute their success to ‘taking time out’ – whether that be to meditate, exercise, walk or to pamper themselves – the crucial point is that they value themselves enough to take quality time for themselves.

So next time you hear yourself saying you haven’t got the time to do something that you know will improve your life or make you feel better, then ask yourself why you don’t feel you deserve the time? We all deserve to have fun, to be happy, to succeed and all of these things take time.

So if you want to lose weight then you need to take the time to eat properly and take some form of exercise. If you want to beat the blues then get out of the house and do something fun today! You can make yourself feel a whole lot better if you really wanted to – it takes time – yes, but time that can help you change your life.

So take time now to thing about how you can change your life in some way, how you can help yourself and remember that you are worthy of time and as life is all about time, you are worthy of the best life ever!

Responsibility Versus Blame…….Let The Race Begin

Responsibility and blame line up at the start of the race – both look on top form and both have their own band of supporters. They are on the starting blocks………..and then they are off. Blame gets off to a good start, with responsibility close behind. It’s a close battle at the beginning of the race and blame,fueled by anger and self pity, steams forward inching away from responsibility, however responsibility has maintained an even pace and manages to overtake and surpass blame, sprinting towards the finish and with a clear vision of success in mind, crosses the line and takes first place. A race well run with the only true contender winning.

As a therapist I deal with many people who suffer from a myriad of issues ranging from lack of self esteem to bad habits to excessive eating and before I can help any of them, they need to accept responsibility for there issue and for any subsequent changes. This does not mean that they are to ‘blame’  for their issues it simply means they need to acknowledge that in order to change they have to accept that they can not keep on going the way they are going.

For example, I often hear from clients who are overweight that it is because of ‘hormonal issues’ or ‘it’s in their genes’ or that they ‘love food’ or ‘they kids love this food’ but they do not acknowledge that it is anything that they are doing that is causing them to be overweight (research also shows that that very few people have what is often referred to as the ‘fat’ gene). So how can I help someone who blames their genes or the fact that they love food and don’t wish to change their eating habits? I can’t!

However if an overweight client comes in and admits that they have several issues with food that they wish to address then I can certainly help them and they can help themselves too because they have admitted responsibility for their weight. They have chosen to overeat or to eat unhealthily, and it may well have been something they were ‘taught’ as a child, but as an adult they can choose to change or continue to blame someone else for their being overweight. It is a choice. We can take responsibility for who we are and who we wish to become and we can acknowledge that what we do is not working therefore we need to change something to make it work.

Taking responsibility for our lives is incredibly empowering and instead of blaming God, the kids, your parents etc for what is wrong in your life, isn’t it about time you took responsibility for how you behave? Of course you may well suffer from anxiety or low self esteem if you lived with domineering or critical parents, but is you continue to blame your parents for your low self esteem you stay in victim mode and you maintain your low self esteem. So does blame really improve your life in anyway or does it give you the easy option of staying where you are and avoiding change?

Yes your parents could have contributed to your low self esteem however as an adult you have to accept responsibility for yourself for who you are now. That may mean that you can acknowledge that events or people in your past contributed towards your lack of confidence or anxiety etc however as an adult you now have the choice whether to continue blaming the past or move forward qand improve your future.

Responsibility features very much is all adult relationships too and I quite often see clients who wish to increase confidence or feel  better about themselves after years in an abusive or controlling relationship.  In any adult relationship be it love, work or friendship you have to accept 50% of the responsibility for that relationship.

Yes it may be that your partner is physically and emotionally abusive and he/she may be the ‘bad’ one in the relationship, but by staying in the abusive or controlling relationship and allowing your partner to continue the abuse you are just as responsible as they are for the state of your relationship. Both parties are equally responsible however for the victim it is very important that they realize that they have a choice. They can either allow the abuse to continue and blame the perpetrator for their awful life or they can  refuse to allow the abuse to continue and either leave or get help and thus accept responsibility for their life and their well being.

Whilst you can change who you are you can not change other people unless they accept your help and in order to do this they need to accept responsibility for where they are in their lives too.

Anger is another great excuse for people to play the blame game and I have come across many angry people in my life! (I too have given in to anger but at least I can see who is to blame!). Anger masks another emotion, usually fear, and  is used as a defense mechanism to protect against emotional hurt and in some cases too, to avoid the individual acknowledging that they are unhappy in their lives. How many times do you hear people blame others for losing control? ‘It’s your fault that I am angry!’ they shout but is it the other persons fault that you lost control? Absolutely not!

We control how we feel and if we chose to let someone upset us then we are to ‘blame’. We can either ignore hurtful words or respond to them angrily, either way it is our choice how we react. We can stay in control or we can let the other person take control by responding negatively.

If you suffer from depression, anxiety, anger, negativity, worry – then take responsibility for how you are feeling today and tomorrow you can change your life by changing how you feel. Your thoughts make you who you are and only you (with some help if you require it) can change your thoughts. Stop blaming your mum or partner or siblings or work colleagues and take the initiative to take back responsibility and change your life. You will feel so much better! It may take time but believe you me, it is well worth it!