Loose Something? Cash, Weight…….

Most of us refer to weight loss or losing weight – it’s one of the highest search terms in google – and many people try to lose weight many times during their lives especially before a holiday or event (wedding, graduation etc) but how many of us question the actual language we use?

I will use the term ‘weight loss’ on my website as it’s what potential clients search for but I do not use it in my sessions! And if you think of it – there is a pretty obvious reason as to why it’s best to avoid the phrases ‘weight loss’ or ‘losing weight’ – and alteratively choosing a more motivating phrase instead.

When we talk about ‘loss’ in general – is it usually associated with happiness or sadness? Sadness – that’s right – loss of a loved one, job loss, loss of human rights etc. LOSS has many negative connotations to it and yet we use it more or less all the time when referring to the process of slimming or shedding excess fat! So no wonder you feel so miserable when you keep referring to weight loss on your journey to your ideal weight!!!

Also – what about losing weight? Do you want to lose weight? Yes of course you do but seriously – do you want to ‘find’ it again too? Probably not!!! When we lose something (usually car keys for me!) we ultimately set off to find it don’t we? So our mind has linked lost, loosing, lose etc with something that we need to find – so guess what – if it ‘hears’ your saying that you have lost weight – it may well feel obliged to help you find it again – just as it helped you find those missing keys the other week!

So chose your words wisely – every day – not just on matters of slimming! If you are trying to shed a few pounds or a mountain of fat – then tell yourself and others that you are ‘letting go’ of the excess fat/weight – as letting go suggests we had something once that served a purpose (a boyfriend/book/behaviour etc) but now we no longer need it so we ‘let it go’ to make us feel better.

Or use an even more positive phrase which not only uses more positive language but also provides an image (it will do each time you say it believe me) in your mind of your desired goal – the slimmer you.

Starting each day with a positive affirmation and visualization – of ‘I am slim and healthy’ focuses your mind on what you want (slim and healthy), tells your mind exactly what you want (slim and healthy) and helps you to remain focused on what you want to obtain (yes you’ve guessed it -slim and healthy).

Change your language today and see how much better you feel about your journey to a slimmer and healthier and happier you! IT Does make a difference to how you feel and if you feel better you will feel more motivated and if you feel more motivated (you are getting quick now aren’t you?!) you are more likely to succeed at reaching your ideal weight!

So chose to let go of your excess weight and focus on your ideal weight and shape – see it, hear it and feel it – it can be yours!

Good luck – and if you need some help with letting go of those nasty beliefs preventing you from reaching your ideal weight – give me a shout! I have helped hundreds (including myself) to fulfil their goals of reaching and maintain their ideal weight – so I can help you too!!

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Letting Go Of The Ego

The ego is part of who we are and if we are not careful your ego can run and ruin your life.

We are used to hearing comments such as ‘he’s on one big ego trip’ or ‘they are too egotistical’ yet what does it really mean. When we use phrases like these we do so in a way which pertains to the individual as being too full of themselves i.e. listening to their egos desire to be liked, to fit in. However are we not being egotistical by judging them?

Your ego’s role is to protect you from perceived threat or hurt and upset, however all too often our ego takes over where rationality should be. If we were hurt by our friends back in primary school then it doesn’t mean to say that everyone else from that moment on is out to get us although unfortunately our egos view, if left unchecked, could be just that which is hardly realistic!

For example, if someone is on their ‘grumpy horse’ (like my son this morning) your ego’s usual response is to take the matter personally and you will usually hear that well-worn voice in your head saying things such as ‘how dare they be rude to me’ or ‘who do they think they are?’

Both statement are ego based (the situation is about me) and far from rational (the poor woman is having a bad day).

Responding to someone elses bad mood in a personal and negative way will often end up with some form of retaliation in order to be seen to defend ourselves – to say to the world ‘we are good enough’ or we harbour a grudge, both create bad feelings and anger. And besides if you are good enough then do you need to prove it to other people?

The ego makes us think about our needs too much and places little thought or consideration on other people. The ego also tends to be ‘all or nothing’ – ‘they hate me’, ‘they think I’m stupid’ etc.

Now if we ignored our ego and realized that everyone’s human and that we can all have a bad day then our first response to the above situation is remarkably different. We become more aware of other people’s feelings, we are less judgemental and we are certainly more positive and less hostile! We live outside our limited perception and become aware that other people see things very differently from how we view the world.

So if your first response it to take what people say or do very personally then you are more than likely too caught into your egotistical response, however choosing to realize that there are other views of the world and not just your ego’s, can open up many more doors for you in your future as well as leaving you feel more rounded, loved and calmer and more content with life.

So next time that voice in your head says you aren’t good enough or that someone is out to get you – question it – as it’s more than likely you are good enough and the other person probably doesn’t even know you exist! And if they do know you exist and are rude – then guess what? It’s about them not you so move on!

Your mind is just that, your mind, so if your ego is controlling it then it’s certainly controlling you, so maybe it’s about time you thought about taking back control of your mind.

Try mediation or mindfulness. Be aware of the moment and choose to see the world through a more rational pair of eyes – see the world through the eyes of someone else from time to time – it’s amazing how differently things can seem! You never know you may begin to realize that you aren’t all that different from all those other people out there!

The Butterfly Hug

Recently I have mentioned the Butterfly Hug which is a really simple yet powerful way to release negative emotions such as grief, anxiety, depression and trauma and this is an excellent tool to help kids who suffer from anxiety due to Aspergers, Autism, ADHD etc as it’s something they can use themselves easily once taught.

Seeing Is Believing

Many clients come to me in the hope that they can feel more confident in certain situations whether that be driving, singing, dancing, public speaking or to simply feel better about themselves.

I usually see these clients for a couple of sessions however there is an incredibly easy and effective tool that anyone can use which will build confidence over time and as they say, the more you do it the more you will benefit!

Visualization is (and I can not stipulate strongly enough!!!) one of the most simple yet powerful self help tools available to one and all and is completely free! The majority if not all of top athletes use visualization to enhance performance and it has been proven that visualization is more effective than just training alone. Top business men, professionals, actors, singers and even doctors use this simple tool.

Why? Well first and foremost because visualization  reprogrammes our mind for success. Your mind does respond to the thoughts you have and the images you create in your mind too. So if you see yourself confident you mind will respond accordingly. Also the part of the brain that responds to what we actually see is the same part of the mind that responds to what we visualize too, so your mind will just assume that you are the confident individual you see in your mind and will accordingly produce the behaviour appropriate. And the more you see yourself confident the stronger the new neural pathways become to that new more positive behaviour.

Secondly, when you visualize yourself feeling good and acting in a way that you wish to behave, you will automatically begin to feel better in yourself too so visualization stimulates these wonderful feel good feeling more and more in response to the positive images we create.

Thirdly. The part of your mind that is responsible for your behaviours in the unconscious mind and this part of our mind has many duties, one being to move you towards pleasure and away from pain. So whilst you visualize yourself acting more confidently, you begin to feel better too, so your unconscious mind will begin to associate this feel good feeling with acting confidently  and as it wants you to feel happy it will produce more confident behaviour to ensure you keep feeling great!

Visualization may not be easy to begin with as you may not be used to creating images in your mind but believe you me, you do produce images daily in your mind whether you are aware of it or not! Think of something you love and you may be surprised to notice an image pop to mind straight away! If you do struggle with visualizing then daydream – most people can daydream and quite often do about winning the lottery!

When you see yourself confident in your mind you may notice your physiology adapts accordingly too, however really get a sense of, or an image of just how you would look, how you would behave, especially in those situations that perhaps you would avoid. How do you sound when you speak? How do you walk? How do you feel in yourself? So really get into how you would look, feel, think, behave when confident and most importantly is FEEL how great you feel when you see yourself confident because the better you feel while visualizing the more confident you the quicker the transformation!

Get into a routine too – visualize first thing in the morning to set you up for the day and several times during the day – it only needs to be for a couple of minutes to make a difference each day. If you are preparing for something that you need to feel more confident about then see yourself doing what ever it is, whether it’s presenting or chatting up that guy at work that you’ve had your eye on for ages, but see yourself doing what you want to do in the way that you want to do it and make sure that you focus only on a positive performance because remember – what the mind can see the mind will achieve!!

So get seeing you in a more positive light and see how quickly you begin to feel differently. Confidence is based on perception and by changing how you see yourself in your mind you are changing how you perceive yourself in everyday life too.

Good luck!

Hypnosis Helps IBS Sufferers

It is a well known fact that hypnosis can help you to stop smoking but did you know that it can help alleviate Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) symptoms too?

Some types of hypnotherapy and indeed NLP can get to the bottom (excuse the pun) of why you developed IBS in the first instance and as a result can help banish symptoms altogether.

Research from Sweden into hypnosis and IBS has conclusively found that hypnosis does help with symptoms of IBS

Perjohan Lindfors, a doctoral student at Sahlgrenska Academy, the University of Gothenburg, Sweden, came to this conclusion in a thesis titled “Implementation of gut-directed hypnotherapy for IBS in clinical practice.”

Lindfors believes hypnotherapy should become standard practice for patients with severe IBS.

Hypnotherapy helps reduce the impact of stress, which is a known aggravator of IBS symptoms, as well as help them to visualize their gut improving too. Visualization is key to improving IBS symptoms long term and is well documented in how it improves performance of top athletes and it can be utilized to improve gut performance too!

So if you want to find out more about how hypnosis can help you with your IBS then give me a call today  07532 110457 or visit my website for more details.